A grass design that says ‘Our Mother, Amman’ with the Jordanian flag on the back left corner, and a street swiper, swiping the dust at the front right corner.
This photograph speaks to me a thousand words.
Without him, what will this image look like? Does he know the worth of his contribution? Or does he see this side of his image in my photograph? How much contribution do we need to do for his self-realization?
I started loosing my mind, but it is that sense of loosing that you know and you have experienced before, it is that moment when your brains are vomiting out ideas like a volcano explosion, I am certainly uncertain about how good or bad that is to say… Ideas, can they ever be bad? Pressuring, time consumption, possibility, vulnerability behind intentions, have I really come up with this idea for the sake of the before and after ideas, or is it a really good idea. You leave it, sleeping in your notes on your phone, or you stick it on a post it in front of your every day wall, or you scratch it down in one of your note books, I tried several times to organize that habit of mine that includes notes scattered everywhere, I have even started this blog just because of that, I think I have it written somewhere in my introduction or past introduction identifying the reason behind starting a blog: “to have one place for all my stars in my sky”. Sky, but there is a sky everywhere, isn’t there. I mean you go to Africa and there you have a sky, the same sky that you see in South East Asia, and then you have stars, but they are not always the very same stars, and this is my life with my notes, only a little overwhelming when I come to think about adding one more. But I add it, just in case you never know, one day, some day I might need it or find it or get back on it, does this happen to you at all? And this again goes back to my reason behind choosing to get into Anthropology, I just want to study people, my ideas are around understanding people, understanding situations, knowing the “unclear” a better word chosen to “unknown”, I just want to study things that happen that we can not utter in words, and so there is a complication in verbalizing, and so I suddenly am attracted to them like gravity calling me to make meaning of things.
Just a note on this post: I have been readings and thinking non stop about anthropological approach to anthropological topics for the past 24 hours “Dissertation Topic Matters”, maybe it will make better sense to my explicit post.
For balance, for improvement, for being wild and free. A life inspired by Zebras is a life full of adventure. Kind, aloof, appealing, and diverse. To a life that is all about balance, giving and not taking but learning. A life that is about community, surrounding yourself with the right elements of life to be who you are born to become. A life that is generous, that is unlimited, that is infinite, that is abundant. It gives you, it feeds you, it challenges you, only to make you a better version of your own self. To Zebras, for the love of Zebras, for inspiring us, Human, to be unique, like a print, that can not be identical but can be very similar. To company, to reflection, to having a partner in life who can look you in the eyes to show you what a brave one you have been, to mothers and fathers, who are ideals, who are leaders, to their children, if not to the world. They stand their ground, they raise their shield, they put you first, they surround you with protection and love. To independency, that is limited, yet free of boundaries, to being your self, but being true to others, to being there for yourself and to everyone else. To great company, to accepting, to playing, to enjoying life, to dancing for life, to learning about love, to give love. To be generous in giving love, to nature, to everything natural, to being like nature, changing in seasons and only surprising us with a more beautiful version of yourself.
One morning, while I was in Tripoli, I woke up with an urge to go study the architecture of few monuments in the old town city. It felt more like… it was an internal study, a study of my own soul architecture. As I went gazing and zooming in with my camera, into what looked like an Ottoman design, I was able to see a reflection of myself. Refined architecture. That is hidden between several other elements, creating some sort of haziness. They are there, right there, but no one can see them. They are too busy with their every day routine, that they never get to once sit, and enjoy the beauty that lies between their own reflection. They have taken everything for granted. They don’t really question the meaning of their existence, seeing them standing out, not noticing that they do not look like the rest of the other buildings. So they have been blended along with all the other buildings, and they will only rise again when someone takes initiative to pull the curtains off. They are curtains covering the eyes of the people, and not covering the work of art. The work of art, is there, visible. And that is when, people will question, “how did we grow up to become so blinded?” And that is my soul architecture, it has been created in a way no other can see but myself. I can see it, so clearly, if I give myself the opportunity to. I can sit and watch my own soul stand out. I can sit and watch my own soul put, as it was put in the first place. Watch the design, it was created to appear to be, and let it be what it is here to be.